i never wanna say goodbye

i'm back.for good.
i actually experienced for the first time a very painful goodbye(of if u wanna get techy-goodbyes)today.i never really knew how hard it would be to say goodbye.

but i guess spending every waking and even sleeping moment with the same people everyday,you would whether you like it or not grow some love for those people.a love you wont realise is there until it's farewell time.
which is probably why it hurts more.

i cried when i went for ns.cause i was super homesick and i just wanted to go home.i just didnt believe all the crap that as told to me then that sooner or later i'd enjoy myself.
but i was wrong.
and i guess u wouldn't believe it too.u just gotta experience it for urself.

and i cried when i have to leave.especially when my sabah sarawak budds had to leave in the mid of the night.that sucked the most.

a day before goodbye,people were already crying and i just didn't.i thought i wouldnt.
i thought wrong.
this is where it gets interesting.i was really sad when everyone were saying their goodbyes in the dewan makan the night before we left but i didnt cry.what triggered my tears?
i shed tears when i realised that my silat partner,miera whom i've spent too much time with prac silat(and having fun at that too)is going back to terengganu.i dont know why but at that moment the fact killed me.

i'll blog more about camp when i get the chance.

got home at9.30today,showered hurriedly and left for church.choir practice and worship team practice till bout6.then dinner at unc.raymond's hse.got home at9.30.slept only2hours in the last night at ns.results tmr?i'm a lil numb,but i'll just put my trust in the One who knows what's best for me.

i am wiped out.

but more than that,
i really miss them a lot.